Emotional expressions are a byproduct of the thinking process. Negative thoughts can produce negative emotions and behaviors, resulting in elevated stress levels that can be physically and mentally damaging. As you continue to practice self-awareness, you gain more clarity and see things in a positive light – NO problems, ONLY solutions! Focusing on gratitude and fulfillment as opposed to lack and disappointment. With this shift in perception, and practice, your feelings toward everyday occurrences in your life change for the better, as do your reactions to those situations.
When you grasp and employ these invaluable techniques, you feel lighter and more carefree. You can avoid unnecessary stress and alleviate feelings of depression, fear, anxiety and other needless emotional baggage. The complex life you perceived to be a burden is now simplified and enjoyable. Subsequently, you can feel like and see yourself as the incredible being you were created to be!
Applying these advanced life skills can literally change your entire emotional, physical, and spiritual landscape. The process of waking up to this higher conscious self is known as self-awareness or self-actualization. Here is a real-life situation that requires a shift in perception to eliminate needless stress and help you see a positive reality in the bigger picture:
You may have prepared so hard for what you thought was your dream job interview, but then failed to get hired.
- Are you thinking… I didn’t get the job because I’m really not good enough?
- Are you thinking…That was the best opportunity I could ever have!
- Are you thinking… I’m always going to be stuck in this low-end job!
This kind of negative thinking and self- defeating attitude clouds your perception, slows your progress and sets you up for constant failure. A temporary feeling of disappointment is normal and almost inevitable, but holding onto these negative feelings does not change the outcome. It only generates additional avoidable stress and gives you more of what you don’t want!
In order to eliminate this self-defeating thought process, the subconscious mind needs to be rewired. The subconscious (or unconscious) mind is a sublet of the autonomic nervous system, which is responsible for controlling not only involuntary actions like your breathing and heartbeat, but also over 90% of your thought patterns, decision making, and actions. It may seem like your conscious mind is in control, but until this unconscious part of the brain is reconditioned you have a lot less control over your thoughts and decisions than you may have perceived!
Your past memories, life experiences and the belief and value system you have conjured up since you were a child is what’s really in control of your thought patterns and behaviors. The insecure self-image that you attach yourself to is not the “real you”. When you are able to separate, or free yourself from these materialistic, preconditioned, self-defeating and most often times negative controlling factors, you can then begin to identify with your “true, always perfect, internal self”. This perfect self is the permanent spirit that dwells within each of us and will never perish. Working to consciously change this old, limited, false reality or ego-centered perception of life, allows you to be in control and choose more freely what you think, decide and act upon.
If you are going to change a negative habit or pattern of belief that has been ingrained in you for the last 20, 30, 40 years or more, do not expect results overnight. Your previously programmed, conditioned, unconscious ego-centered mind is going to fight like hell to resist these changes, so you need to make a continuous, consistent, conscious effort to make these new changes and clearer perception a part of you. You are basically recreating yourself, leaving your old self behind. Gratitude, acceptance and realizing that in the bigger picture all things happen for a reason is a great place to start!
Let’s get back to our job interview example. In reality, maybe you didn’t get hired because it just wasn’t the job you were meant to have. Another applicant may have had a specific skill that they were looking for, or maybe you just didn’t click with the owner or manager personality wise. It happens. It doesn’t mean you are not good enough. Don’t think of it as an end all. Most likely, this isn’t going to be the only opportunity you will have. The fact that you didn’t get that particular job doesn’t mean that you have to stay stuck in your current job either. The next job opportunity may pay even more and be the perfect fit for your personality type and skill level!
Think positive, apply action and let the universe do its work. Whatever you put out there comes back, it’s the universal boomerang effect!
Keeping the above example in mind, follow this step by step process to avoid unnecessary toxic stress. Change your perception of reality from self-defeating to empowering by practicing self-awareness and self-acceptance, in accordance with the appropriate necessary actions:
- Accept the outcome of the situation. You didn’t get hired for the position you applied for and you need to accept that. Remaining angry, upset and disappointed does not change the fact that someone else got the job. Holding onto these negative emotions only creates further unnecessary suffering.
It is much easier to accept most outcomes you face when you immediately focus on being grateful for what you already have in life and not on what your lacking. If you are truly grateful, acceptance follows more naturally. Remembering that things happen for a reason is huge! This is a universal law that applies to all of humanity whether you believe it or not.
Look at the bigger picture and embrace positivity and faith. A lost opportunity could mean making room for a better one, and if you truly believe that and take the appropriate steps it will be so!
- Change your perception of the situation or event impending. It’s certainly not an end all just because you didn’t get the position, so don’t take it so seriously. When you start to think negatively and get down on yourself, recognize the behavior and practice, becoming fully aware of your current thought process. Give yourself a break and change your crippling pattern of thinking. Simply take the negative self-defeating thought and apply a positive twist to it. Negativity will not change the situation and only attracts more of the same. Your outlook, feelings, body language and verbal expressions towards any particular situation define the type of person you are, not that particular event itself. Attitude and conscious perception are everything!
It is all a conditioning process. The more you practice becoming aware and conscious of each individual thought and emotion, the better you become at replacing negative thinking patterns with positive ones. As you continue to work on yourself your sub-conscious mind will begin the rewiring process, and this new and improved perception will become a part of you.
- Apply affirmative action! So now that you accepted the fact that you weren’t hired, reevaluate your approach, make sure you did the best you can, make the necessary changes (if any), and look for the next opportunity. Be confident that the universe or higher power has your best interest at heart and go get that dream job you were meant to have. Turn your challenge into a better opportunity! SHOW your gratitude with a great attitude whether you feel it yet or not! Get ready for a more superior quality of life and escalating sense of well-being and empowerment!!
Words of wisdom from the incredible Wayne Dyer, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” You are the creator of your own reality. It’s that simple!
It is widely accepted that stress has debilitating effects on the mind and spirit, and wreaks havoc on the physical body as well. Remember, feeling stressed is mostly subjective, and how you perceive it makes all the difference in how it affects you and others around you. When self-awareness is heightened you will be able to objectify your subjective self and no longer see yourself as a victim of circumstance.
In order to attain optimal wellness, it is mandatory to manage hard to avoid stressors. Gaining better control of your thoughts and emotions, while limiting (or eliminating) unnecessary ill-perceived stress will come more naturally as you develop and practice the techniques of self-awareness and self-compassion. A holistic approach to eliminating and managing stress is essential as it integrates the mind, body, emotion, and spirit collectively.
When you begin to rewire your sub-conscious mind, you can shift from a fearful, self-defeating, limited perception of life, to one of empowering beliefs and habits with no fears or limitations. Fulfillment and joy as opposed to lack and disappointment!